Wednesday, April 27, 2005

A Different Angle On: Family.

Family. It is a word that describes so many things including the people we are raised around, related to, or work with. Scientists use the word "family" to sometimes articulate the way plants and animals relate to each other, even though they are not actually related. How funny is it that we humans have such a strong tie to our families, yet so few of us are proud of them, or even like their relatives?

For years I have been trying to understand why I cannot seem to understand my family. My Mother is not the person I have known all my life; she has changed. My Father is nothing like me with the exception of the way we walk and our impatience. My sister is separate even from these criteria; she is a mother, and a wife. She is also Christian of late, and I am a Medium. So, you can see how it would be difficult for us to identify with each other on a consistent basis.

I get the feeling that I am not the only American woman in her late twenties who is not married, pregnant, or belonging to a group of any kind. I don't make pronounced claims of affection for certain members of my family, and a few of them seem only to proclaim their disappointment in my lack of Authorial success. I constantly find myself saying: "How do I feel about being a disappointment to my parents?" After all, in this country it appears that if you don't have a job, regardless of your reason why, you are looked at as being lazy or unsuccessful.

I won't stray from the subject here, but I do want to bring up a point I feel quite strongly about. I am not a failure because I don't handle employment well, don't own a house, and can't pay my bills. I am working on something great. I have written my autobiography for the purpose of helping people similar to myself overcome terrible depression, and to help them understand my view of "God." I mean, I haven't been sitting on my laurels for a year, pondering the good life at ole Mom 'n' Dad's. I wrote a BOOK; a big one at that. I have a wonderful friend who is going to help me get it in with a big publisher. "Blessings in Strange Places" is by far the largest accomplishment of my whole life, and yet, my parents and their pals sit around talking about how unhappy they are with me.

Families are interesting entities. I know a family of folks who are perfectly nice people when you get each of them alone, but as soon as they are in a group together, they are hateful and negative. I know another family who can't stand to clean, so they lump it all on one person. Yet another family makes excuses for the person in the who is causing the problems, and they yell at the sensible one for being just that: sensible. Seriously, think about YOUR family. If you could sum it up, what would you say?

I try very hard to be understanding and compassionate, but I find it so hard to do that it is counterproductive to try. I can see that being a family trait. Yeah, somebody else's family, maybe. Nope, in my family, if you remind someone of another family member, they start treating you like you are that person. There is a drug addict in my family. She has nerve damage as a result of the drug use. I did ONE thing that was similar to her, even thought the worst thing I've ever been addicted to was smoking cigarettes, and POW, they look at me like I'm going to be just like her. That's not fair, but hey, that's family.

Look at family from a different angle. We all have spirit families almost completely separate of our earthbound fam's. They forgive everything and try to nudge us in the proper direction. I am in constant touch with my spirit family because I Channel (meaning I am a Medium of sorts) and can see and hear them. My spirit family is very amazing to me. They have saved my life a number of times, kept me from assaulting the last boyfriend I had with an aluminum baseball bat (nice, huh?) and have managed to pull me through some horrible times in one piece. I don't know what life would be without them.

It is hard to know who's advice to take, physical Dad, or Master Guide. Hmmmm?

In actuality, it really isn't that difficult. I listen to my Master Guide because she is standing on a higher plain of existence than my physical Father, and she may have access to better information than he. I don't know what you believe, but I know that this physical family is temporary to a point. Yeah, I love them, but I'm not going to allow them to run my life, or change the way I think about living just because they don't like what I do. After all, I don't see any of them with big plans.

Final thought. Are we Americans so whipped by the money subject that we've forgotten to be freedom thinkers? Is that the American way?